Temptations

The power of Satan's temptations are very real and something we must be constantly aware of. In 1 Corinthians 10:13 we are taught that through the power of the Holy Ghost we can overcome our temptations. President Henry B. Eyring said,"Withthe help of the Holy Ghost, we can watch over ourselves. We can pray to recognize and reject the first thoughts of sin. … And we can, when we must, pray for the humility and the faith to repent.” There are so many who have felt that there was no use in overcoming temptations because it was too hard and while it is not always easy keeping the commandments we have been provided a way. There are many who don't understand why members of the church obey the Law of Chasity and Word of Wisdom. They believe that life style is freedom and the church is restrictive. What they fail to understand is that keeping the commandments is freedom. To achieve that freedom is to not partake of the worldly activities but even if we succumb to temptation we can take comfort in knowing the Lord has provided us away to repent and gain strength to resist those temptations that would drag us down. President Eyring also stated, “The Savior is our Advocate with the Father. He knows our weaknesses. He knows how to succor those who are tempted.” We can also have peace in knowing that the Lord will not tempt us beyond what we can endure. However it is up to us to use the Atonement, the Gift of the Holy, and prayer to overcome Satan’s power. We need to be humble and have the faith to ask the Lord for His help in turning our weaknesses into strengths.It helps to remember that we are never alone. The Savior suffered for each of us and knows exactly what are individual struggles and weaknesses are. Remember the scripture found in Ether 12:27 which reads, "And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then I will make weak things become strong unto them." Have faith be humble, and remember we are not alone, and through the Savior we can turn our weaknesses into strengths. 

Blessing of the Scriptures

Sometimes I wonder why I have to raise my kids alone. It's hard and I miss being married and the family life. This quote helps me to remember that the Lord has a plan for me even if I can not see it.  I am reminded of a blessing I received about 15 years ago that said, “If you read the Book of Mormon daily the Lord will bless you and keep you safe.” If I read my scriptures daily the Lord is going to direct my path. Elder Richard G. Scott said, "The scriptures are and excellent source of understanding and strength when pondered with faith in the Savior. They bolster faith in truth. When the truths revealed are applied diligently, they become a vital source of worthy motivation. You will increase your courage to do what is right. Your discipline to adhere to the most important priorities of life will be fortified." While I may believe that some things are good the Lord knows what things are actually better. I need to put my faith and trust in Him and I do my part He most certainly will do His. He told me to read the Book of Mormon daily and He would bless me. I know this to be true and that when I feel I'm being rejected from something good I'm really being blessed and re-directed to something better. Reading the scriptures daily will give me the motivation and courage to continue to go forward knowing that the Lord will bless me, guide me, and not lead me astray. 

Traditions

I believe that having family traditions is important. They are ways that bring families together and strengthen relationships. One of my favorite family traditions is to go see the play "A Christmas Carol" every year. This tradition was started with my grandparents and parents when they were newly weds. My family has gone every year for over the last 40 plus years. I loved going when I was younger and now I love sharing this tradition with my kids. They look forward to going every year too and I hope it's one of those traditions that will continue on. 

School Event

My boys had their school Holidays Around the World event where each class put together different food, pictures, and reports from different countries and some of the holidays they celebrate. My boys were excited to show me what they worked on and the school did a great job there were was so much to see. I think it's important to go to events like this. As a family we need to show our support for each other it's one of those simple ways we build and strengthen our relationships. It also shows my children that I love them and care about they events and activities it hat are important to them. 

Conflict and Contention

Did you know there is a difference between conflict and contention? Often we are mistaken and believing that conflict is bad however it is normal for opinions and beliefs to differ and conflict to arise. When conflict arises it is our choice whether or not we will choose to remain calm and peaceful or become angry and contentious. No one can make us angry or offended that choice is ours and it is one that is influenced by Satan. When we become angry we break down relationships and once we say things in anger we can never take them back. It is our choice whether or not we will become offended. Often times we see many people leave the church because they were offended over something simple but again that is another one of Satan's tools and is something that can be avoided if we learn how to have conflicts without getting contentious and becoming angry and possibly damaging relationships. We don't have to win every disagreement and prove we are right. It's ok to agree to disagree.

Activer Listening

I have been thinking about actively listening lately when communicating with are friends and family members. One thing that stood out to me was how we need to actively listen with love. I believe if we actively listen with love our communication and relationships will improve. It's important to stop and be patient when listening to our children and family members. The relationships we build in this life will carry with us in the next. A big part of our family relationships is communication. If my children don't feel that I am really listening to what they say they will go to someone else who will and that is not always a good thing.  I realize that sometimes when I'm listening to others I find myself coming up with my response or interrupting. It's a bad habit and I know that when I do this I'm not really listening to what others are saying. I also realize that with my kids I'm too quick to offer a solution or fix their problems when maybe they just wanted someone to listen to them. This is way I feel active listening is a great communication skill to work on to help strengthen my family relationships. 

What a Teenage Boy Needs Most from his Mom

I came across this article one day called

"What a Teenage Boy Needs Most from his Mom." I really liked this and felt it applied well to me as I have one teenager and one almost there. 

I have enjoyed each stage my kids have gone through and so far I'm loving the teen years! My boys are so fun. 

However as a single mom I often wonder if I'm doing enough to meet the needs of three boys especially my teenager. So in the article she shared 11 tips that teenage boys need most from their moms.

1.  A safe place to figure themselves out.
It happens almost every day, and sometimes many times a day:  Teenagers are always changing.  They will change their clothes.  Their mood.  How they walk, talk or what they’re into.  Some days they just need to figure out what feels right.  Some days nothing feels right.  Being a teenager is hard.  Sometimes our greatest job as Mom is to act like we don’t even notice.

2.  Boundaries.
Our boys need to know what is absolutely ok, and what is absolutely not.  They may resist rules, but deep down they feel safe when there are clear-cut rules without exceptions.  Make them clear and consistent, and have absolute consequences in place for when they break rules.  Boundaries =Security. 

3.  Freedom.
Within those boundaries, teenage boys need the opportunity to stretch their wings.  Teenage boys should be encouraged…Even pushed–to try new things, to take some risks, to find adventure.  Given enough opportunities for healthy adventure, they will avoid a lot of trouble.  (Remember–“Idle hands” and all of that…)
Keep boys busy doing character building, exciting activities and watch them become men before your eyes. The minute my boys act in irresponsibly, they will lose freedom.  So the freedoms we give are taken very seriously.  

4.  A Listening Ear.Boys need to talk.  Even the quietest ones will open up when given the chance.  Get them alone, in the car or wherever you can, and make it clear that you WANT to hear about their interests, and their lives.  Be patient, and try different times and places until you figure it out. This makes it clear that I am OK with any and every topic and I will always be available and comfortable talking.

5.  A Sense of Humor.
This is the good stuff.  Teenagers…are hilarious.  This may be my very favorite thing about these years.  No more knock-knock jokes or bad made-up jokes that never seem to come to a conclusion.  Teenagers actually GET STUFF.   There’s hardly anything like the bond of a good laugh with my boys.

When one of my boys come out laughing and want me to watch a funny Vine or YouTube Video, I drop everything for it.
Side note #1: As for us–**We have a rule of “clean” entertainment only.  No swearing or anything off-color.  And they know that if I find them following anyone inappropriate, I’ll remove their Vine/YouTube etc account (See #2))
Side note #2**I have a “I can check your phone, computer, etc anytime I want to–no questions asked.”  This keeps everyone in check.

There is plenty of FUN and FUNNY entertainment out there if you look for it.
it’s a hard world:  A good sense of humor will get your kid through many trials in life–So encourage it.

6.  Touch.
Your teenage son will likely pull away from you physically, and that is normal, albeit painful.  But even the most rigid, sulky teenage boy needs hugs from Mom.  Don’t get awkward and keep a distance.  Create a “hug a day” rule or something that makes it routine and normal.  He’ll love it even if he refuses to show it.

7.  Genuine interest.
What does your teenager love?  Learn to love it too.  Know at least enough about what they are passionate about so that you can have a decent conversation.   This will keep doors open greater than any other gesture you can make.

8.  Forgiveness.
Teenagers will make mistakes.  Lots of them.  They’ll act selfish.  They’ll space out.  They’ll get insecure and do stupid things because of it.  They are going to mess up so much you’ll wonder where you went wrong.  If you know it’s coming, it won’t throw you off.  Consequences may be in order, but so is a whole lot of grace.

9.  Direction.
Listen Mom:  Your teenager actually WANTS you to give them guidance. Sure, they’ll act like they don’t, but they do.  Keep it relevant, and as brief as possible, but when you see them facing forks in the road, go ahead and speak some good solid words of advice to them.  Share a Scripture that fits their situation.  Quote someone they might respect.  You are their greatest resource they have, and they need your direction.  They’ll thank you, even if it takes twenty years.

10.  Encouragement.
It’s hard to be a teenager.  (remember?)  The world will yell and scream all kinds of negatives to your son.  So be his greatest fan.  Be his cheerleader.  Believe in him with your heart, and tell him that you do.  Every.  Single.  Day.  I’m not talking about phony, contrived encouragement (Everyone is a winner!) but the authentic kind that finds their greatest giftings, and speaks them boldly.

11.  An example.
Our kids are watching us.  They get a lot more of an idea about what is right, wrong, good and bad from what you do than what you say.  So take your position seriously.  No, you’ll never be perfect, and you can tell your kid that–but don’t use that fact as an excuse to be lame.  If you don’t want them to swear, don’t swear.  If you teach them to speak well of others, make sure you do the same.  Probably the greatest thing you can do for your son is to model the kind of person you want them to be.

The common key to pretty much everything named is that Mom is involved in the teen’s life.